Managing stress during transitions: Surviving a 9-5 + Moving back home.

So, with all life's transitions and just life in general: shizz can get crazy. Not surprisingly, after graduating college and starting full time work, things got a lil hectic. If you know me: you know I love my peace, and that anything threatening it must be addressed. So naturally, I started finding ways to adjust. Not only did I need to survive my new situations, but I also wanted to thrive in them. As usual, you know I gotta put ya'll on to whatever I find.

Now, if I ever write a post that doesn't reference gratitude, you know my body is being inhabited by aliens. So let's talk about it. When you're stressed, angry and just over it, the last thing you wanna think about is gratitude. Let's be real. But, at the same time, it's also really hard to be stressed, angry or bitter when viewing life through a lens of gratitude. I began by being thankful that I had a landing pad. I had a place to come home to and take my time with finding a job. This allowed me to really weed out the bad seeds and choose a job that suit me. If coming home was not an option, I'd be forced to accept the first job that came my way. And let me tell you, the first round of jobs I applied for were tryna play me. Like Bye, I know my worth honey (even though no job can really pay me that much lol).

So now, I've got a job that aligns with my skills and desires, it's all smooth sailing from here right? Naw! Once I found the job, it was litttt for like the first two weeks. That steady paycheck was fire, but with the steady check came steady stress. Deadlines, supervision, office politics and just a bunch of things no one warned me about. I knew I had to shift my thinking, so that's what I did.

Acceptance: This concept has been tremendously helpful to me in everything I do. It begins with acknowledging things for what they are. Calling stress and adjustments by their respectful names, essentially robs them of their power over you. It relieves you of the judgement that holds you back from exponential growth.

Patience: As I’ve mentioned in my discussion of acceptance, understanding that you’re in a transitional period is a powerful tool. Gently remind yourself that you’re undertaking a new task, role, and mindset. This is all new to you. Do you see a baby judging himself after falling when he's learning to walk? No, you see them getting back up and eagerly doing the thing 'til one day they're "suddenly" running. You really gon' let a baby outdo you??

With that being said, you’ll need a lot of patience to allow yourself to learn, and make mistakes. Putting a time frame on your progress is counterproductive. You’ve never done this before , so how can you tell how long it’ll take you to get it?

Forgiveness/ flexibility: With any transition comes mistakes. You’re on a learning curve , it’ll take a while for you to find your flow. In the process of doing this, you’re gonna make mistakes. Those are simply methods that don’t work, and it comes with the territory. Give yourself permission to try new things and learn from your own follies. Be flexible in your approach.

Build a support system: My adjustment to my newest situations honestly continues to be a struggle, but it becomes less heavy when you find support. In addition to the regular post college, 9-5 thing, I’m also transitioning from full independence to learning interdependence. I needed to find a whole new group of people, who understood the struggle . People who are in the position I’m heading (supervisors), people who have been in my shoes (other new employees or newly grads) and people who don’t really care where I am (my day ones).

I’ve also had to draw on my own inner support. I’ve really had to anchor down on my internal cheer leading skills. This has helped me to feel less LOST IN THE SAUCE. Being there for myself, listening to my body for signs of stress and simply allowing myself to flow with this process, has worked wonders for me. This leads me to my next point.

Give yourself credit: I often have to remind myself that I’m doing the dang thing!! The fact that I’m feeling crushed under all this pressure means I’m being reshaped. I like to think of yourself as a fine ass diamond or a piece of clay (lol I prefer the diamond, who wants to be a piece of clay). I'm being molded into a new, amazing being. I am Becoming. Let that sink in: BECOMING. Yes, it doesn’t feel great being lost while you’re learning, but it’s all a part of your process. In accepting the process , you give yourself credit for how far you’ve come. You get excited for where you’re going. All this depends on acceptance of where you are: under pressure , learning and handling everything life throws your way.