Square One

"One day at a time", says the clients I work with. They say it everyday, and I say it too sometimes. So much so, that it's become cliche and just a thing that fits. What I find interesting about this phrase, is is how I can console others with it, but it somehow doesn't apply to me. I can muster up endless reservoirs of patience, empathy and positive criticism for them , but never for myself. What's up with that?

Right now, I am not ashamed to say that I am back at square one. I have allowed myself to become unhealthy in eating, fitness and my overall lifestyle. This is okay (acceptance). I have the tools that I need to change that. I also know that every moment is new. At any point in my day, week, month and life, I can make the decision to turn things around. At 12:55 pm, I can restart and decide to have a better day, regardless of missing the bus, arriving late and dropping my coffee this morning.

Starting from square one, or even circling back is the best option. When I "fail" at achieving my goals, it becomes tempting to kick myself. Easy to succumb to negative self-talk. Moving forward, instead of allowing self-pity and negative self-talk to push me farther from the finish line, I can simply pick up everything and continue, or even start over. I am never really starting fresh, because I start from: "oh okayy, so that's how that works". I learned from the pint of messing up, I learned how to get over the obstacles and I learned new ways to come back stronger. "Oh I'm just not good at this". "Everyone is my family is like this, so I have no choice". "This is just who I am". Whatever lies keep you comfortable, must b uprooted so you can grow. The story you tell yourself, is the one you have to live out.

Yes, my family has a history of poor communication, unhealthy eating, obesity or whatever else, but that is not my story. I refuse. I am accountable. I am willing and able to learn, change and grow. I have a lot of skills. I know how to meal prep, I know how to step back and examine m emotions. I know how to be disciplined.

Now, here are some practical ways to live in ways that develop you:

1. Asses: What do you know about the thing you're working on?

For me, I am working on a healthier lifestyle. I understand that its not "one and done". It's not a destination, but a journey (cliche af right?). I will not wake up one day just eating healthy and working out like I should. I will not magically go to therapy (or however else you find support). But right now, I can start meal prepping again, actually use my dang gym membership, and work on building discipline.

2. Plan/Identify the tools that you need:

I was successful in this area before. I know what to do. I know the healthy foods that I like. But I will have to buy healthy ingredients (no, oreos don't count). I also need to buy discipline, in bulk. Discipline comes at the cost of excuses and kicking your feelings out of the driver's seat. Your feelings cannot drive the boat. Discipline is the real captain.

3. Do the dang thang (ayeee that rhymed!! Bars. I should be a rapper by now.)

Literally. Just.Do.It. The minute I allow myself to start questioning my ability to achieve, I have opened the door for excuses. I have given myself an opportunity to find reasons why I can't do the thing. Just take the steps. Be impulsive (sometimes).

I want you guys to try these steps and share your results. Which step was the hardest?